Call of the Wild

Sunday, April 25, 2010
I want to eat my baby. My friend, Bangs, has come close to taking a bite out of B, but I figured it's because she's biased, being her kindof aunt and all and because she hangs out with me and is as close to hispanic as you can get (my brother often calls her his little tortilla.) So I thought that wanting to eat babies was a spanish (and spanish wannabe) thing until Bangs's sister came out to visit and said, "E is so cute, I want to eat him up." Bangs's sister is super white American. Then D was talking to his mom and she said, "B is so cute I just want to eat her." D started laughing and theorized that it must be a woman thing. Not a hispanic woman thing necessarily, but definitely a woman thing...because no guy we know has ever yearned to eat either of my babies.


I mean, look at those arms. And those cheeks. And you can't tell from this picture, but her chins all rest on her chest and the crease where they all come together, well...that's my favorite place to bury my face and gobble.

A light bulb just went off over my head. What if animals in the wild don't eat their young because of competition for resources, but because they find their babies so cute that they start to nibble and then accidentally get carried away? This would revolutionize the theory of evolution as we know it. Oh, my phone's ringing. Must be the Noble Prize committee calling me now.

2 comments to Call of the Wild:

Geeks in Rome said...

The Italians say that, too, men included: that they want to eat these delicious pudgy babies.

I was growing up (in the US) most adults wanted to squeeze the bee-jeebers out of us... no cannibalism in the Northeast :)

caramama said...

I totally want to eat my babies! My (very white, Episcopalian) mother says the same, and that she just wants to gobble them up, which I also say. However, my husband says it too.

It's interesting to read your post on this, because I've been mulling over a post I want to write that pertains to this. No Nobel prize winning theories, though. ;-)

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